Have you ever stopped to ask yourself what in the world is the point of high school?  What is it that your child REALLY needs to get out of their high school years?  What are the priorities?  And what if YOUR priorities don't align with what others think your priorities ought to be?

It is when our kids hit high school that we begin to ask ourselves the tougher questions, and we homeschooling parents begin to feel the pressure of "getting it right" so we don't "ruin" our kids.  How many times have we all read those words written online in heartfelt, anguished posts from educating parents who are fearful they are going to somehow screw it all up?

Depending upon who you talk to, you will get a wide variety of answers to this question.  Some would say the point of high school is career and college readiness.  Some would say it is to have the time of their lives and still be kids!  Some would say these critical years are for growing academic skills, and exploring who they are as maturing young adults.  And (thankfully) a few would say the point is to hopefully come out alive on the other side! Haha!

Instead of asking, "What's the point?" I would suggest an entirely different approach.  How about asking a very different question instead...

"How can we make high school a meaningful experience?"

What a difference in tone alone that particular question reflects!

You see, high school is an important time in anyone's life, but sometimes we focus so much on
​"the point" that we literally lose the bigger picture.  We focus so much on the end goal and where our learners go from there, that we forget high school can be incredibly meaningful and a formative time in all kinds of ways, and that it needs to be about a lot more than getting to the end and measuring something.
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Just as in the image above, when we focus too sharply on the end goal or the point far off in the distance, we miss out on here and now.  This doesn't mean we have to set aside goals, ignore academic achievement, or take all pressure off.  Kids learn to handle the pressure of adult life by gradually being introduced to it in small, ever increasing doses.  We also need them to be academically well prepared for their future, whatever that might be.

But there is more...SO much more...to high school!

This is the time of greatest freedom to explore who they are, to try all kinds of things and find interests that are non-academic.  The high school years are when they try on new personas and settle in to one, so guidance and reflection back to our learners about how the latest incarnation of themselves strikes you is important work.  Teens are gaining new skills such as driving, handling their own affairs and their own schedule, and are hopefully also learning how to do real work as they step into adulthood gingerly.  

It seems all anyone wants to focus on through these precious years is achievement and complaining about kids doing the very things they ought to be doing at this age...trying things out, casting aside some, grabbing hold of others.  Some call it flighty and unfocused, and expect a finished product by the end of the teen years.   How absolutely unfair!!

How can you make your teens high school years meaningful?  

Give your kids free reign to volunteer anywhere they want to.

Work on trying new hobbies, crafts, clubs, sports and more...yes, even (maybe even "especially")
if they are not transcript-worthy!

Think about your children the way you used to...as whole people, not just as a student who needs to get good grades to get ahead in life.  Remember when they were toddlers and so excited about the world around them, and you couldn't WAIT to show them everything?  Why do we lose that attitude as parents once we bring grades and textbooks into the picture?  We don't have to, just remind yourself of ALL the parts of your child!

Take time to chew on good books together about topics that matter.  Explore read alouds together that are more adult, such as self-help books, philosophy, etc.

Talk about current events and ask what they think. Make this a part of your daily morning or evening routine.  Don't TELL them what to think, either, let them share their developing thoughts about the world around them and don't cringe when something strikes you wrong.  Remember that point I made above about trying on new personas?  Let them differentiate from you, but insist they support their point with more than "because I think so"!! You might be surprised at the level of thinking this evokes.

Share more about your dating years, your struggles with trying to fit in, your doubts as a young adult as you faced the world on your own for the first time.  Share when you screwed up, made a fool of yourself, or lost a first love.  

Challenge them to try something new and difficult, something way outside their comfort zone.  Applaud them if they fail or succeed, for regardless of the outcome they have definitely learned something new about themselves.

So, what is the point of high school?  Maybe the point is that there is no single point to it, and there never should have been in the first place.

There are thousands of homeschool bloggers out there who expound upon why they homeschool, share the merits of homeschooling versus public schooling, and give ten point lists of why you should, too.

This is wonderful, and I was an avid reader early on of homeschooling books and blogs as we entered the realm as "accidental homeschoolers" after the first day of fifth grade when our son trudged in the door and said it was going to be the longest year of his life, then shuffled down the hall so morosely I almost wanted to cry right then.

As time marched on, I began to internalize all the reasons homeschooling was the best choice for us, and reading the words of wisdom from moms who traveled this path before us helped me to better articulate why were taking this unusual step.  While these blogs named things for me, pointed out benefits to me, and helped resource me, in time I began to realize that what was happening in our home mattered more than what anyone else had to say.

Homeschooling moms and dads, have you sat down and really thought hard about why you are homeschooling?  As the high school years approach, or you are knee deep in post-high school planning, are you getting so caught up in the "what we need to do" that you need to remind yourself of your "why"?

Simon Sinek is an author, speaker, and I would add a quite inspirational thinker...though we seldom tend to think of those in the business world as "inspirational thinkers".  The more I listen to him and read his thoughts, the more I see someone with a sense of emotional intelligence and awareness that surpasses most in the business world today.  He wrote the top selling book, Start with Why: How Great Leaders Inspire Everyone to Take Action.  In it he points out that when we start with "what" we are doing, we do not inspire nor are we inspired, but when we start with "why" we are doing it, we actually discover that motivation wells up automatically. 

I read this book several years ago, perhaps just as we started homeschooling, yet I never connected the idea of starting with "why", or even being a leader, to my homeschooling role.  You know what?  Today, as we have graduated one and have four more to go, I truly see the gift in understanding and regularly returning to my "why" for homeschooling.  I also understand that helping my kids understand their own personal "why" is  important for them as they seek out lives of meaning and future careers.

Additionally, I know that my daily explanations of "why" we are studying certain subjects has helped them "buy in" to what we are doing.  This is an important one to think about: how often do you explain to your kids why they need to study certain things?  Do you help them connect their daily immersion in topics now with their future?  Do you help them find the benefit in their learning so they can see it matters and isn't just to "check a box" and call it done?

I could use this blog post to share all the reasons why our family decided to homeschool. Many of those reasons would have you nodding your head in agreement.  But I wonder what you might say was unique to your family, what your special "why" is.  I am curious if all those terrific reasons you had for electing to opt out of public education get lost on the final run toward the high school finish line and panic sets in about what everyone else is doing, or thinks you ought to be doing.  

So, I am not going to waste my words here sharing my "why".  I am simply going to remind you that you definitely had your own "whys", which are just as valid now as you approach graduation and
post-high school choices as they were in elementary school.  Your "why", and your child's "why" matters!  It is your guiding statement!!!

As you work through what post-high school life looks like for your teen, return to your "why".  Each time you feel like you are somehow inferior because others are taking a different path, return to your "why".  When spring comes along and next steps are being shared, and your child's might appear to others as "less brag worthy", return to your "why".

"Why" leads to the greatest satisfaction.  It leads to success.  It leads to where someone's sweet spot is.  Just because your child's peers are attending great colleges, doesn't mean they have the slightest sense of their own "why".  Hopefully, they will find it in school, and yours may find more affirmation of their own "why" in trade school or on their first job as they work toward their future.

So stop for a moment after reading this, and jot down your "why" on a Post It note.  Leave it where you can see it regularly.  Then...realize you are doing just fine, because your "why" is clear and it is about a lot more than "what" you are doing.

Dominick LaJoy, my very own hubby, has been
self-employed for 21 years.  He spent 18 years owning two businesses that partnered well as seasonal businesses here in Western Colorado.  We owned a small cafe in our local airport which was busy during ski season, and the remaining 8 months of the year he ran our auto detailing business, Wow! Wash on Wheels. I asked him to share his experience as an auto detailer here with us.



Blue Collar Homeschool (BCH):  How did you get started in auto detailing?  Did you learn on the job?
Dominick:  It was presented to me by a family member who had started detailing a couple of years before.   It is definitely  a learn on the job type of career.  Also, later on I learned a lot from YouTube videos, and I also never hesitated to ask questions of other detailers, and I learned a lot from them.  Eventually, after doing hundreds of details it does settle somewhat into a routine. 

BCH:  What kind of skills would someone need to get into this line of work?
Dominick: You have to be detail oriented and task driven.  The proof is in the detail and how detailed you get. Someone brings you their vehicle, expecting it cleaned to their expectations, or better.  You have to deliver, each and every time and that means taking the time to go through the steps required to complete the task.  You also need to have some basic business skills such as accounting, scheduling and time management, purchasing, etc.  To save money, being able to repair your own equipment is a must, so mechanical ability is helpful.

BCH: What did you enjoy most about your job?
Dominick:  I got great satisfaction taking a vehicle from dirty and restoring it to like new, or as close as possible to new. 

BCH: Is a lot of your work by rote, or do you have opportunity to be creative?
Dominick:  There is always room for being creative!   Not so much as in the sense of changing your routine and how you detail a vehicle, but the odd problem that comes up.  Sometimes this could be a customer's time constraints and how long you can have to clean. Other times, (and most often) it was a strange odor that a customer had in a vehicle. Knowing how to locate the source and how to properly remove the cause, sometimes in a creative way, can make this part of reward.

BCH: Did you always have an interest in the automotive world?
Dominick:  I enjoyed the mechanics of a vehicle, and a great paint job. After high school I attended Universal Technical Institute for auto mechanics.  After graduating, and with some time working for a dealership, I discovered it really wasn't for me.  Auto detailing was a good alternative.

BCH:  What did you think you wanted to do in high school? 
Dominick:  I always knew that I wanted to own my own business someday. I thought it would be a mechanic's shop.  Now I have owned a restaurant, an auto detailing business, and I currently own a liquor store.

BCH:   What was a typical day like at work for you?
Dominick:  I started early.  Quite a few of my customer's were farmers, or other self employed people like myself, and they appreciated that I was open early, so they could start their day of work, too.  I always did laundry and lots of it!  I purchased a washer and dryer so I could do my own towels.  Most of the time it was washing the same load of towels 3 or 4 times to make sure they were clean.  Answering phone calls,  returning phone calls from customer's, ordering chemicals and supplies was also part of my day.  Of  course, it also came down to doing the actual work.  Using a power washer takes up a fair portion of the day so you can't be afraid to get wet.  Picking up and dropping off vehicles or customers comes into play here also. You MUST have a good driving record and the ability to drive every type of vehicle from an old VW to a semi truck.  You never know what could be next that someone may want you to clean!  Equipment repairs eventually come in to play, not always on a daily basis, but you have to know how your equipment works and how to make the necessary repairs.  Shop cleaning, while it should be on a daily basis is one of those things that gets left out of the daily routine,  but this will catch up to you, and it will just take you longer to complete the task.  Mixing chemicals for the job/day/week.  This sounds easier than it is.  You have to know proper dilution rates for the chemicals that you will work with.  Reading and understanding product/chemical labels, how and where to use the chemical and the proper protection is also necessary
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BCH:  Did you consider your work difficult?  Rewarding?
Dominick:  At times it can be difficult.  Having good help working with you can make the day easier.  The reward comes not only from the customer expressing their gratitude for a clean vehicle, but also from the person working with you, knowing that they also helped take care of the customer.  

BCH: What advice would you give to someone who might be considering this for a career?  
Dominick:  Expect to work really hard physically, and having a social personality is helpful as you meet a lot of different people every day.  Spend money once and purchase high quality equipment, it saves so much time in your day to day work that it is well worth it.  Finding good employees can be challenging, as the work is demanding.  Start out by cleaning your own car, or close family members car first.  Then move on to other family members' cars.  You won't get paid for doing this, but the value comes in stepping back and looking at the finished job.  Learn from each job, what and how to do the next one. 

BCH:  What classes would you suggest in high school if someone is considering this as a career?
Dominick:  High school classes should include some computer, basic business, accounting, marketing and business law classes.  Auto shop would be great, too.  Learning the mechanics and how  a vehicle is put together will help you in understanding how to provide a better cleaning job.  You will have to sometimes remove parts of a vehicle to provide a deeper clean then normal. 

BCH: Would you recommend being an auto detailer if you don't own the business?
Dominick:  If you enjoy cleaning, sure. Finding the right  shop to work in may be tough, but keep looking, they are out there.  However, if you don't own the business, do not expect to earn much above minimum wage.  It is a great place to start learning the trade, though.  Owning the business, you can have a great source of income.  Labor is your highest expense, and charges to customers can vary widely depending on the area you are in.  A full detail can cost as little as $100 - $125 in lower income areas, but in higher income areas you can get as much as $250 - $275 for a full detail, which an experienced detailer can complete in 3-5 hours without extra labor, or with an employee it can be completed in 2-4 hours.  I managed to support a family of 7 with my detailing business.

BCH:  Anything else you'd like to share?
Dominick:  If you are in this business, you need to keep looking for avenues to expand your knowledge base. Chemical companies may have hands on seminars or training classes on their chemicals.  Learning the right way to use chemicals is a must in this line of work. Paint, upholstery, carpets and plastics differ from each manufacturer. Staying on top of these changes helps you stay ahead of the competition, helping you to stay successful in  your business.  There are also add ons to help increase your income such as paint chip repair, paintless dent repair, bumper repair, headlight restoration, windshield chip repair, upholstery repair, window tinting, and more.

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I'd like to introduce you to a remarkable young man, Caleb Williams.  A homeschool graduate who has a side business working with leather, Caleb's work was shared on our Facebook group page, which led us to having a conversation and he agreed to be interviewed.  I think you will find what he has to share about leathermaking to be fascinating!

Caleb's Bio:  I am 21 years old, and the oldest of five kids. I'm from Yuma, AZ. My college major is Aerospace Engineering at Embry-Riddle Aeronautical University in Prescott, AZ.

All four of my siblings, two brothers and two sisters, are dyslexic. I noticed that was one of the things that is mentioned in the about section on your page. Each one of us learns in a slightly different way, so my mom has had to do a lot of curricula tailoring (though her core curricula have been Sonlight and All About Learning). In highschool my mom let me have a small say in the direction I wanted to take, so I chose to have a very math and science heavy education, though she balanced it with plenty of history and literature, among other subjects. My mom's desire for us is to get useful college degrees (like my engineering or my sister's nursing), or vocational certifications (such as welding, for example).

Blue Collar Homeschool (BCH):  How did you get started working with leather?  Did you learn as a hobby?  Did you have a mentor?
Caleb:  I got started with leatherworking when I was 11 in 4-H. It was offered, and I wanted to try making something in addition to raising a rabbit. In the 4-H club I did have a mentor, though I can't remember his name. He did leatherworking as a hobby and enjoyed teaching it. My second year in
4-H leatherworking I won a Best Amature Leathercraft award for a wallet I made for my grandfather. After that I sort of left leather alone until last year. I picked it back up last summer because my dad needed a couple items made, and a lot of people told me that I was good enough I could make a business out of it. 

BCH:  What kind of skills would someone need to get into this line of work?
Caleb:  The most important skills to have in this line of work are dexterity and hand-eye coordination. Leather can be used to develop those skills, but professionally it is necessary to already have them. It helps to be able to draw well, but there are thousands of leathercrafting patterns available online and in books if drawing is something you struggle with. 

BCH:  What do you enjoy most about your job?
Caleb:  The thing that I enjoy most about my job is showing something new and unique to the world. Equally enjoyable is seeing the reaction when someone first sees in person this thing that was only in their mind before. 

BCH:   I know your business is a bit of a side business type venture to help pay for college.  Had you studied entrepreneurship prior to beginning?  How have you marketed your leather items?
Caleb:  As for entrepreneurship education, whenever I find a Ted Talk or article on the subject I listen or read for advice. Perhaps my best entrepreneurship teacher has been my previous business, Leviathan Logos, in which I made custom logos for businesses and individuals. I learned that I need to have a good idea of the time it will take me to finish an order, and that I need to charge enough to be worth that time. I also learned that people respond better to physical products than to virtual (like logos in image files). I have primarily marketed through word-of-mouth (both in person and online) - that's where I find the best and most loyal customers. I have also tried Facebook advertising a couple times with mixed results. 
 
BCH:  Do you like custom work?
Caleb: I *love* custom work! It is by far the most satisfying of the work that I do - especially when I can deliver in person and see the customer's face light up. Each custom order is a new challenge and new inspiration. 

BCH:   What did you think you wanted to do in high school?  What's your college major?
Caleb:  Since I was nine years old I knew I wanted to be an engineer in some capacity or another. In high school I realized that I also want to be an entrepreneur and own my own business. An engineering business would be especially great, but I know for sure I need to create. I'm most happy when I'm making things.  

BCH:  What is a typical day like at work for you?  Do you get an order and spend many hours on it, or spread out your time on it? 
Caleb: Typically when I get an order I get inspired and want to start as soon as possible. So I usually start as soon as I find time and as soon as any I receive any materials I have to order. During spring break this year I spent 12 hours a day, two days in a row working on and finishing a chessboard. Occasionally a large or repetitive project will drain my inspiration and I spread it out more. However, I always finish by the time I have told the customer it will be done.   

BCH:  Do you consider your work difficult?  Rewarding?
Caleb:  Occasionally it can be difficult. I remember one project for which someone ordered a trifold wallet with a violin on the back. I made a first run of the wallet, but it ended up too small to even hold credit cards. I had to start over on that project. Sometimes stitching can also be difficult physically on my fingers. Though, in my experience so far, every project has been more rewarding than difficult. 

BCH:  What advice would you give to someone who might be considering this for a career?  Do you think someone could make a go of this full time, and if so, what sort of specialized area would you think would be most profitable?
Caleb:  I think that if anyone likes leathercraft and wants to make a full-time go of it that it is definitely possible. One of the easiest areas in leathercraft to get into is Western style, as the modern art of leatherworking was born in cowboy culture. One of the most profitable areas is comic book and fandom culture, though it is an extremely hard market to break into and requires a lot of determination and guts (mostly because of potential legal problems). Another good avenue might be YouTube, but that also takes a lot of patience. My advice is to find what you enjoy the most and do everything you can - practice, fail, learn - to be the best in your market. I would love to get into that fandom market, but until my business is large enough to support that I am taking any leather jobs I can to build my skill and my audience. 

BCH:   Are the tools and materials expensive to get started?  If you do more work, are higher quality tools very expensive?
Caleb: Tool and material prices are, as with anything, relative. In the beginning, with no prior experience, the cost of tools and materials is pretty steep - a 7-tool starter set costs $50 and a mallet, depending on type and quality, costs anywhere from $6-$25 at first. Then you also need a hard, flat surface you don't mind hitting on accident (I use a granite slab), and your leather. It's best to start small with pre-punched kits (as low as $20 from Tandy Leather), these usually have good instructions to get you started. Later on, when you've gained experience and skill, new tools - for edge dressing, hole punching, stitching, and more - cost more. Leather costs less, though, because you start making your own patterns from bulk leather. I currently have about $150 in tools, and there are still a few that I would like to acquire. 

BCH:  Do you have a shop or dedicated space to work in?
Caleb:  

BCH:  Do you have a shop or dedicated space to work in? 
Caleb:  I do not have a dedicated workspace, though I would really like to have a standing height desk to work at. No, I am working out of my living room currently. Though I do try to keep all my tools in one place. 

BCH:  Are you continuing to add to your skills and knowledge in leathercraft?
Caleb:  Yes, I am always trying to improve my leathercraft skill. My skill improves with every project I take on, and occasionally, when I have a lot of down time, I find projects so that I can try new techniques and broaden my horizons. 

BCH:  Are there learning links for leather work that you could share for us if one of your readers is interested in trying it out and learning more?
Caleb:  There are a few links that I would recommend:
Tandyleather.com is where I get my tools and supplies from. They also have a lot of learning resources. Tandy also has a YouTube channel with a lot of great instructional videos as well as their "Maker Series" which are a set of short videos in which they interview full-time leatherworkers for their advice on running a business. 

I would also recommend a YouTube channel called Alec Steele. Alec is a blacksmith, not a leathercrafter, but he is my age and has a booming blacksmithing/YouTube business. He often gives great business advice for the aspiring craftsmen. 

BCH:  As a homeschool graduate, do you think homeschooling prepared you well for college and career?  Are there deficits you are noticing, or strengths you have that public education students don't seem to have?
Caleb:  I think that homeschooling prepared pretty well for college. I am wonderfully average here at school - basically it's a good challenge. The only deficit that I've really noticed is that I struggle with timed tests - though many of my peers do as well, so it could be other reasons. One advantage I seem to have over my public-schooled peers is my willingness to meet and have meaningful conversation with new people and authorities, like professors, despite the fact that I am rather introverted. 

I would like to thank Caleb for taking the time to answer our questions.  If you would like to contact Caleb, you may reach him at WilliamsCT@outlook.com, or at his Facebook page for his business, Leviathan Leatherworks www.facebook.com/LeviathanLeatherworks/

Here are a few more photos of Caleb's amazing work!

Well here we are, a new year almost upon us, and the old one waving goodbye!  

Homeschoolers tend to view the "new year" as beginning in September, as we embark on the next grade level, bring on new curriculum, and thrust a unique project or two into the mix.  January is often our mid-point, and as we take a breather from the prior semester, sometimes we look back at the previous fall and early winter months and reassess.  

But you know what?  Sometimes, we find ourselves too married to the materials or path we chose.  Sometimes we are reticent to take time for reflection to discern whether or not  we are heading where we wanted to, and then we will kick ourselves later on when the end of the year arrives and we didn't attain all we had hoped for.

And that is because we continue to think that old ways will open new doors.  We think that if we just do more of what we did, if we work harder, if we measure it more, magically we will end up with the result we desire.

Nope.  It doesn't work that way.  

In order to open new doors of learning, we need to do it differently.  We need to switch it up!  We need to infuse our teaching with something unusual, exciting, and out of the ordinary, because ordinary gets us...well...an ordinary education.  We have the gift of choice, we need to take advantage of it!

So, right now, this very moment, let me urge you to take just ten minutes to do a little reflecting.  Grab a piece of paper...go on now, go get it!  Humor me! :-)  Then, create three columns, one titled "Things We Do Well", one titled "Things We Can Improve On", and one titled "Teaching Skills to Improve".  Start writing.  What works for you and your family?  Where do you excel?  No false modesty here, we all rock at something, so write it down!

Look at that column, applaud yourself, it is well earned!

Now the second column.  Is there a subject where your curriculum is just "so so"? Maybe it gets the job done, but it isn't really doing much for anyone and there is an attempt at hiding eye rolling when it is time to work on it.  Maybe you sense there might be a better way.  Or perhaps it isn't even half bad, but you know it could be more engaging and you aren't quite sure what to do.  

In the third column, I want you to look at one other thing beyond the curricula.  I want you to do an honest assessment of yourself and your teaching skills.  What might you improve on?  Does grading writing stump you?  Do you wish you knew how to lead better discussions with your kids?  Do you struggle with helping them make connections?  Is your own vocabulary in need of a tune up?  There is no shame in admitting there are areas for improvement, after all, I am betting there are is an overwhelming majority of homeschooling moms who never planned to become in home teachers and never took courses explaining how best to educate someone!  

As 2018 dawns, don't make a bunch of major resolutions, just take one thing on that list from either the second or third column, and vow to make one change.  No, don't attempt to change every item you have there, changing just one thing will be enough to celebrate, and will take enough work to achieve.  If you don't have a clue how to change it, ask someone!  Post to our Facebook group that you need help thinking about you Change for 2018.  There is a 'brain trust' there that is like no other.  Or ask your husband, or other homeschool moms you know face to face.  Heck, ask a teacher how to better approach teaching a certain subject or improving a skill!  

Most important though, is understanding that if you want to open new doors, you gotta throw out the old ways of doing things and embrace new ones.

Happy 2018!  May the year blossom for you in wonderful ways!

One of my biggest pet peeves is the "Teen Bashing" that occurs with great regularity on social media these days, but also happens in face to face social situations as well.

When did it become acceptable for grown, supposedly mature adults to feel it is within their right to be disrespectful to an entire age group?  When did we decide that "dissing" teens was appropriate?  Why is this one particular group attacked and ridiculed on a daily basis, and when do we figure out that we are doing nothing more than unfairly stereotyping?

If we turn this around to reflect upon it for a moment, if we were making similar comments of those of a different race, different sexual orientation, or hey...let's hammer this home... SENIORS, etc. we would be lambasted immediately.  However, we have been given societal permission to be disrespectful of our teenagers, for reasons I can't quite fathom.

I can't begin to count the number of times that friends and acquaintances have rolled their eyes in mock sympathy with me when they learn we have five teens, four of whom are a year and four months apart.  There are the comments about how can I possibly stand it, how great it will be because soon they will all leave the nest, and comments about raging hormones and attitude problems.

You know what?  I don't EVER let that go unchallenged.  My kids would back me up on that (and it is important that they have heard me repeatedly counter those statements with positive affirmations).  When someone makes a derogatory comment, even in jest, I always state how wonderful this age is, how we honestly don't deal with attitude, smart assery, or sibling rivalry.  I say with great enthusiasm and honesty that I am the luckiest mom in the whole world to parent the particular teens I parent, and my days spent with them, though sometimes hard due to other things like disabilities, etc, are still lovely, warm, pleasant, and some of the best of my life.

I believe it is important for our kids to catch us saying wonderful things about them!  I believe that how our teens act is, in large part, how I choose to perceive them.  I believe that by speaking negatively to others of them on a regular basis can lead to a self-fulfilling prophecy, and frankly, a deserved one that will have been earned by my disrespect.  If I want my teens to treat me with appreciation and consideration, I darned well better be treating them the same way.

Teens are not awful, terrible, selfish, aliens from another planet who magically turn into normal human beings around age 22 or 23!  They are inexperienced people, taking tentative steps to explore their world, practice independence (sometimes successfully, sometimes less so, but it is called "practice" for a reason!), and discover new things about themselves.  They will make mistakes, much as we did at their age, and much as we still do.

But by pigeonholing them as a stereotype, we fail to see the uniquely wonderful qualities of each individual.  We fail them, we harm them, and like drops of water that eventually fill a bucket, our constant negative language about their stage of life has the capacity to bring out those characteristics we dislike, and we never realize how we ourselves pointed so much to the negative that we created a sense of self-defeat in these remarkable young men and women, leading them to begin to act exactly as we predicted.

So why don't we turn this around?  If your kids are on social media, let them catch you saying kind things about them, stop talking about how they drive you to drink too much wine, share their little daily acts of maturing and applaud them publicly for it.  Stop thinking the worst, and get ready to spot the best in them.

We must stop treating our teens and young adults as second class citizens.  At a mere 18 years old they vote for our future, they can fight for our future, and they are our future.  

Let's treat them with the same dignity we would treat any adult.

Recently I "met" someone online whose life experience in automotive mechanics screamed out to me that this was someone fascinating to interview!  Let me allow Rankin Barnes to introduce himself below.  I think you will find his advice and thoughts on mechanics as a trade to be quite interesting!

Rankin's Bio:  My interest in cars must’ve started at age 4 or 5. I remember taking my toys apart and begging my dad to let me go to a junkyard. I hung out at repair shops when I was a kid.  I joined the Navy at 18 and started my formal mechanical education. Opened International Auto Sport at 23 after working at a Porsche dealer and several independent import repair shops and moonlighting during the Navy years.  Started teaching at the community college level at age 30 and continued for 32 years.  Opened Crankin Auto Care at 56.  Authored Crankin Engines at 64. Currently serving as a consultant for secondary and post-secondary school automotive programs.

Blue Collar Homeschool (BCH): What led you into teaching?  
Rankin:  Quite frankly I think it was the Lord. I had reached a dead-end due to drugs and alcohol and was presented with an opportunity to teach by my one of my customers. I like to explain how things work in simple terms and I believe that my customers appreciated my straightforward explanations.
 
BCH:  What do you like best about teaching a Blue Collar trade?
Rankin:  Teaching people how to work with their hands and earn a living excites me because I am able to pass along the skills that I learned from other mechanics and this perpetuates quality the trade.  We, who work dirty jobs, are often seen as ignorant because we are often not articulate.  
 
BCH:  What qualities do your best students exhibit? 
Rankin:  Perseverance and patience are good qualities for everyone. Often the best mechanics do not test well but their logic is way above average. Of course a high mechanical aptitude will enable automotive, aviation, heavy equipment, and marine propulsion students to solve disassembly and assembly problems.  Higher math skills will aid in solving electrical and electronic concerns. That is where the logic plays a huge role.
 
BCH:  What high school courses and areas of study most benefit a young person who desires to move into mechanics as a career?
Rankin:  I will move away from mechanics for a moment.  Collision Repair courses require a great deal of artistic ability. Body repair people are basically sculptors and painters so art courses in clay and paint will help those aspire to that profession.
 
Applied physics is theoretical mechanics. Studies in leverage, friction, vector force, electrical theory, pressure, and electro magnetism are examples of applied physics and these are easily demonstrated at home.

 I think that we are stuck on Biology in the sciences but I never did think that taking a frog apart was as interesting as taking a bicycle apart. The taking apart venture is fun but putting the thing back together is tougher. Small engine courses are really beneficial especially if the engine starts when you finish the course.
 
BCH:  Is it fairly common for graduates to easily find good employment opportunities?
 
Rankin:  Are you kidding?  ;) How many good mechanics do you know? A good mechanic can find a good job paying $30K-$70K in any area of the country. Dealers, independent shops, trucking companies, governmental agencies, and delivery companies all rely on mechanics.  We as a nation have told our kids, “Don’t work with your hands.”, for three generations,  Now there is a shortage of skilled blue collar workers. And wages are going up.
 
BCH:  Do you think it is wiser for someone to open their own shop, or work for someone else as a mechanic?
 
Rankin:  I think that everyone should start working for someone else.  But if there is a lot of family help then the chance of  success in a small business is better, The cost to open a shop, even a small operation, is probably $250,000-500,000.  The skill set to operate a business is very different from that of an automotive technician.  I was very fortunate in my last auto repair business.  I had already built a garage building, I already had  been blessed with three streams of income, and we were debt free.  
 
BCH:  Is mechanics better to go into than auto body repair?
 
Rankin:  Auto mechanics is probably more profitable than body repair. The insurance companies set all of the prices of insured collision repair and few body shops can survive without doing insurance work. Restoration work pays well but a good reputation for high quality restorations takes time to establish.
 
​BCH:  If a student learns auto mechanics, does that training prepare them for careers in other forms of mechanics, such as motorcycles, boats, or other engines?  Or do they need a lot of specialized training to move into other areas?
 
Rankin:  Almost all engine work is similar enough to allow cross over. But only 10% of the repairs involve engine work. Maintenance, brakes, electronics, suspension, alignment, and climate controls are the systems needing the most repairs. Boats obviously don’t have brakes or suspensions but they do have specialized cooling systems and those systems are different from wheeled vehicles. Most good mechanics can fix about anything. The automobile is a complex machine with many systems. And there is no end to learning those ever changing systems. 
 
BCH:  In your opinion, is there a big difference in the quality of training available at a local Vocational school versus a "big name" trade school such as Universal Technical Institute (UTI)?
 
Rankin:  All “big name” schools are set up to crank out a lot of students in a short time. The high cost of tuition allows them to buy expensive advertising and pay their recruiters well. The classes cover a lot of subject matter and the class size is pretty large. Conversely, community colleges use state and federal funding to operate their programs. Thus the tuition is a lot less. Usually classes are smaller and there is more individual attention. All of that said, the quality of the material covered is pretty close to equal. But in my opinion an automotive education over a two year span will result in more student learning than the same material covered in 9 months. Admittedly, I am biased toward community colleges. I did choose to make a career of teaching auto tech in community colleges for 32 years.
 
BCH:  As a homeschooling Dad, how did your approach to teaching in your career influence how your family homeschooled?
 
Rankin:  I felt compelled to teach my kids all that I could about the trades. My boy was more receptive than my daughter. But we worked as a family to build a 900 sq. ft. home and then add 900 sq. ft. on to the existing structure, We were the carpenters, plumbers electricians, and roofers.  When our son was 16 He welded a 4’X8’ trailer. He then started a lawn care business and used the trailer to tow the lawnmowers. Our daughter  went to the Community College during the 12th grade and earned a nursing certificate.  I tried to instill a good work ethic in the kids and the same was true for my students. I preached honesty, safety, and pride in a job well done to my students and kids alike.

I hope you learned as much from Rankin's sharing here as I did!  Auto mechanics is a lucrative, varied, interesting career option for young men and women to consider!  

One of the hardest things that I had to fight our first few years of homeschooling (Oh who am I kidding, I give myself a pep talk every few months!) was the idea that homeschool had to "match" the public school experience.  I had to let go of their standards, their ideas of what subject has to be taught in which grade (Who says state history ALWAYS has to be taught in 4th grade???), and their practices.  What cracks me up was how desperately I clung to public school practices when the reason we left state education in the first place was because it wasn't working for our kids!! Hahaha!  Yes, sometimes we can even be very clear we are being diverted from our path and still feel powerless to stop.

It is easy to understand why, and that is because the overwhelming majority of us were educated in the American public school system, and we came out all right, didn't we?  The truth is, the system has changed since we all went through it, and learners arrive at graduation day less prepared for the real world, careers or college.  More students than ever who do go on to college are taking remedial reading, writing and math courses, and middle to lower range high school graduates are, in ever increasing numbers, unable to read and write proficiently.  

And yet, we feel the need to copy that system, or we will somehow fail our children and are "doing it wrong".

Oh, how hard it can be to let go!  But as the lovely quote above reminds us, when we let go we create space for something better, and in this case, something more customized for your specific learners.

Now, if you plan to re-enter your children into the public school system someday, it might be wise to more carefully follow your local public school's "scope and sequence", which is what skills and classes are taught in what grades.  But if you are fully committed to homeschooling all the way through?  Throw scope and sequence away!!!  Better yet, tuck it aside and glance at it from time to time, if that makes you feel better ;-)

So, how exactly do you go about all of this?  Well, first of all, with subjects like math and reading, if you find a program that works for your child, buy it and work your way through all the levels.  Easy, right?  If it takes longer to understand Algebra 1 and you are working on it for 2 years, who cares?  Master it, then move on!  Read easier books, then gradually harder ones, or find a textbook series that works for you and do each grade level, reading it until you are finished.  Easy peasy!  This isn't rocket science, folks, and we don't have to kill ourselves figuring it out.  Do you do Algebra 1 and 2 THEN Geometry?  Who really cares??  Do what works for your kid!!  Oh, the agonizing hours we spend so concerned that some specific grammar skill wasn't taught in the second half of fourth grade!! As if that really matters in the grand scheme of things.

And speaking of grand scheme, create one!  I wrote a bit about this in another post but not specifically about how you do this.  Start with an end goal in mind, then work your way back.  Is it really important to you that your children learn American History?  Do you think one year in high school is too little?  then teach two!  We did two and a half years, one time through, very solidly, and I discarded the idea of bits and pieces along the way in earlier years.  I wanted it learned in time order, connected and thoroughly, and we did it exactly that way and it worked really well for us.  We are spending three years on World History, one era at a time.  We prefer deep and wide, not shallow and narrow.  We don't check boxes to say we covered something.  Most public schools don't teach life skills in any meaningful way, but you sure can!  If sciences are where you feel more emphasis should be based on your kids' interests and skills, who says you can't do a LOT more science than public school does? There is no real "Sequence" that sciences must be taught in, other than considering where a teens math skills are for some subjects, so teach it in whatever order makes sense for your family!  

But, oh, dear moms, let go...

Let go of the need to match a system that wasn't what you wanted in the first place!

Let go of beating yourself up by comparing your homeschool  to "public school" ...they are not the same and not intended to be.

Let go of the fear that you will fail!

You love your kids with all your heart.  Be diligent, work hard, take it seriously, but whatever you do...

Let go so the richness of the customized homeschool experience can seep into the marrow of your bones.

Don't miss out on the flexibility.

Don't miss out on the ability to adapt as needed.

Don't miss out on the fact that learning comes in all kinds of ways that have nothing to do with textbooks, classrooms, or test scores!

Don't miss out on the joy of your own growth and learning as you gain skills right alongside your kids!

Don't miss out on the fact that maybe...just maybe...you are creating something different and better!

Homeschooling can be anything you want it to be.  Teach the core subjects with consistency and care, throw in interest led learning, and recognize that you are the best teacher they will ever have.

Learning resources come in all kinds of forms, and one often overlooked form is (heaven forbid in this digital age!) print magazines!

Do you incorporate magazines in your homeschool as part of your curricula?  Are so caught up in the world of textbooks and workbooks that you are missing the rich experience of real world materials for your child to learn from?

For tweens and teens in particular, well selected magazine subscriptions can expose your learner to the entire world, and really well written reading material, regardless of topic, can help build vocabulary, keep one abreast of current events, develop higher level reading skills, and can even be used to increase critical thinking.

Think outside the typical checkstand fare of People and Newsweek.  

Do you have a child interested in government, business or economics?  How about The Economist, Governing, Forbes, Wired, Bloomberg Business Week, Fortune, or Inc?  Oh my goodness, the wealth of ideas and information for future entrepreneurs there is staggering!!  Read about current business leaders, their successes and failures, and how they impact the economy both here and abroad.

Do you have a child interested in science?  How about Scientific American, Discover, Nautilus (Our son LOVES this one and bought his own subscription!), Popular Science, and MIT Technology review?

Do you have a child interested in history and geography?  Well, there is the good old standby National Geographic (shouldn't EVERY homeschooling home have this on their coffee table?) but there are many others including Smithsonian (another real "must have"), Civil War Monitor, American History, Archaeology, and  more.

There are special interest magazines for just about any niche hobby or passion, all available to find with a quick Google search.  Auto mechanics, hot rods, dolls, genealogy, fiber arts, and just about anything you can think of is available in some print form!

And if you are concerned about the ideas your child might be exposed to that counter your own world view, what better way to teach critical thinking than to have them read something, then be able to offer solid arguments for or against what they have read!  Remember, we do not need to miss out on learning opportunities solely because something doesn't totally align with our world view, we can use them to solidify morals, values, and ideals by discussing them, analyzing perspectives, and supporting opinions.  Some of our very best homeschooling experiences that have firmed things up have been when we have read something we thought was total bunk, and then proceeded to spend an hour dissecting it and explaining why!  That is important learning happening!

The point is this, having good literature around, regardless of format, is incredibly important to developing self-taught learners.  Magazines are sometimes far better than textbooks because:  A)  The writing is intended to be engaging...readers don't have to purchase a magazine, and advertisers don't have to advertise, so the product had better draw subscribers!  That alone means a probability of better content than the average textbook that no one has a choice about!  B)  More images means more interest...the liberal use of art, photos, and graphics helps the reader to engage with the material more readily, and to get the point more quickly.  Don't we all love info-graphics that quickly tell us more than a 40 page book can? and C)  Essays and articles are often written by the best in their fields, the ones proven most persuasive, most literate, most able to articulate ideas in writing clearly and concisely.  Better writers means better reading material!  The Atlantic, Oxford American, and The New Yorker come to mind as examples of some of the finest writing available to read. 

As Steven King says, "If you want to be a writer, you must do two things above all others: read a lot, and write a lot."  If you want an easier time teaching your son or daughter to write, something many of us struggle with, one surefire way to simplify the task is to have loads of excellent reading material of interest to them sitting around the house.  Two or three magazine subscriptions is far less expensive than a pricey writing curriculum!!

I was reading one of my guilty pleasures this week, Buzzfeed which is sort of the equivalent of admitting to reading The National Enquirer, so I am duly blushing in shame.  However, I found one article that really moved me to do a little research to better understand what they were presenting.  

A contributor was exploring the cost of her parents' extravagant wedding in San Francisco in 1974, and researched to offer an actual cost of how much that same caliber of wedding in the same location would cost today.  She also then offered the calculations as a side by side comparison for what flowers, church rental, photographer and more would have cost if calculated solely at the cost of inflation...in other words, 1974 actual cost, cost of inflation estimated cost, and 2017 actual cost.

It was mind blowing to see the difference!  The estimated costs were, in general FAR FAR below the real 2017 cost, with increases from 84%  to a staggering 941% increase between 1974 prices.  

Now, we have all heard the percentages as it relates to college costs, with some placing it as high as an 1120% increase over the course of the past 30 years. (See Bloomberg), but are we seeing how costs for just about everything have increased exponentially far beyond income?  Do we get how much harder it is for our kids to have the same quality of life we had...not now, but when we were starting out?

I think (since this is an opinion piece, I am allowed to do that!) that one thing that has fooled us is the Walmartization of America, which has allowed us to have certain goods at far less cost than we used to pay for them.  Soft goods, household appliances, etc. are far less expensive than they were in 1974, as a percentage of income.  But as another article I found explains, the cost of our big ticket items is where we getting kicked in the pants...housing, health insurance, education costs, and other services.  So we may have more "stuff" around us and be able to buy even more "stuff" but we are not seeing how a few key expenses have risen so quickly and to such heights that cost of living increases in income could never possibly keep up.  

This article at www.mybudget360.com makes a great point, and I will quote a couple of points:

"We continually hear about the middle class shrinking.  But where are they shrinking to?  Much of the disappearing act has come at the hands of inflation.  That is, their income is no longer sufficient to support the items that we once categorized as part of the middle class: a car, a home, college education for the kids, and basic healthcare.  For many Americans, these items are all getting out of reach.  And for those that purchase them, they are required to go into massive debt with banks."

and

"What is more affordable relative to inflation?  Milk, eggs, and a postage stamp.  Unfortunately these are tiny line items on your household budget.

What you need to look at is the median income here.  US households overall are simply poorer.  They have less to spend relative to the cost of goods and services.  Money is only as good as what it can purchase.  You can’t eat hundred dollar bills.  This is part of the reason why many people feel like they are poorer. "

We, as parents, need to be very realistic about what it is going to take to get our kids started in the world, and how long that may take.  It is harder for them than it was for us.  Period.  Significantly harder.  It will require, perhaps, kids remaining in their parental home longer, it may require longer to establish independence financially, and it may require being far more intentional about teaching them sound spending and saving habits.  

If we do not do our research and understand what our young adults are facing as they try to find their way in the world, we will have incredibly unrealistic expectations about their ability to make it.  We will damage our relationships with them by insisting that "We did it when we were your age, you can too!"...yes, they can...eventually, with strong support, better training, and probably more time. This is not to say all is "doomsday", but awareness of the realities our kids face will help us do a better job as their educators, and will help us be more understanding parents.